Thursday, April 28, 2011

Teeter. Totter. Breathe.

I'm on a teeter totter.

I'm up in the air...I can feel the wind in my hair...the view is just fine.

Diabetes isn't that big of a deal.

I'm on a teeter totter.

I've hit the bottom...I feel the hardness of the reality...My head aches from banging the ground.

Diabetes is SUCH a big deal.

I'm on a teeter totter. I'm sitting in the middle. I'm neither up nor down.

I'm ok.

That is my life.

Riding the teeter totter day after day.

I can't make it stop.

I'm up.

I'm down.

I'm ok.

Tis Our Diabetic Life.

Some days I feel like I'm stuck on the ground. My pockets are filled with weights. I can't move. My tears water the dandelions. On these days, all there diabetes. It's a big deal. It is such a big deal.

Other days I'm flying high. Diabetes has nothing on me. My laughter echoes through the clouds. I'm light as a feather and I can stay up all day long. Numbers are good...there are no worries...deep breath...

It never lasts long.

Because what goes up...

Must come down.

But the middle. The middle is where I spend most my time. I'm centered there. There is no up and down....there is just calm. There is no comfy seat in the middle. I have to brace myself with both hands to stay there. But the middle is a safer place. The middle is where I need to be.

I'm okay when I'm in the middle.

I'm on a teeter totter.

Every day.

Every hour.

Where will I wake up tomorrow? Will I be up? Will I be down? Will I be bracing myself in the middle?

Only tomorrow knows.

Too bad, the teeter totter isn't as fun as it looks.

I'd rather have both feet on the ground. I see people walk by me every day with their feet on the ground. I wonder if they know how lucky they are not to ride every day? I wonder if they have any idea how much I want to walk with my feet on the ground too?

I wonder if they even know I'm on the teeter totter?

Can they see me going up and down, up and down, up and down?

Do I make it look fun?

Are they on their own invisible teeter totters too?

I'm on a teeter totter.

And honestly...all I can do, is try to enjoy the ride.


Post a Comment

Design by Free WordPress Themes | Bloggerized by Lasantha - Premium Blogger Themes | Lady Gaga, Salman Khan